Moustache XI – a tribute to Movember
Every November now, many men across the world grow a moustache to raise money for the charity Movember Foundation.
The idea of growing a moustache is to raise awareness to prostate cancer, testicular cancer and men’s suicide. For more details, go to their website www.uk.movember.com
In tribute to Movember, I have put together a Dream Team of 11 players who sported moustaches at some point in their careers. I have adopted a 4-4-2 formation for the team. Here’s the team in all it’s furry-lipped glory:
GOALKEEPER
David Seaman – the most synonymous moustachioed goalkeeper in my lifetime. Arsenal and England’s number one for many a year and had a talent for stopping penalties.
Honourable mentions to Everton’s Neville Southall, Manchester City’s Tony Coton and Bruce Grobbelaar of Liverpool and Southampton, but Big Dave makes the team.
DEFENDERS
Shaun Teale – nicknamed John Wayne during his career, Teale was a tough-tackling defender. That and he has agreed to do an interview for the blog, so he has to make the team!
John Wark – former Ipswich Town and Liverpool player who could play up front and at the back. I’ll put him at the back but he can get sent forward if we need a winner!
Brian Kilcline – anyone with the nickname ‘Killer’ can go straight in my team. He will strike fear into the opponents and rough them up. No messin’ with The Killer!
Kenny Sansom – Kenny will slot into his best position at left back. My Dad said he was a fantastic defender and with 86 England caps to his name, Sansom will be pick up the number 3 jersey.
MIDFIELDERS:
Steve Heighway – an extremely pacy winger, scored in the 1971 FA Cup Final and another Liverpool player with a moustache! He fits the bill and will add much needed pace to the team. Congratulations on getting into the team you moustachioed speed merchant!
Carlos Valderrama – famous for his gargantuan hair, this Colombian supremo will add some South American flair to the team. The hair needs to be sorted out though, it’s the moustache that got him into the team!
Philipe Albert – anyone who can chip Peter Schmeichel from 30+ yards and make the Great Dane look a fool is a legend in my eyes. Enough said.
Rudi Voller – played as a forward but I’m bringing him back into the midfield because I have better options up front. Anyone who can get away with a mullet and perm over the course of their career and get away with it is more than welcome to join the team. Voller picks up the number 7 shirt and starts on the right wing.
FORWARDS:
Ian Rush – Rushie is Liverpool’s greatest ever goalscorer with a huge total of 346 goals. Ian was one of the star’s of the 1980’s and was even the face of an advert advertising milk of all things! The first name on my team sheet.
Gordon Davies – another club’s greatest goalscorer here, this time Fulham benefiting from 159 league goals. Another interviewee for the blog, his interview will be out in the next few weeks.
MANAGER:
Frank Clark – the only manager that I could think of who had a moustache! He did manage Nottingham Forest to third place in the Premiership in the mid 90’s and they qualified for Europe as a result so he has that on his managerial CV!
With all of that in place, my bristly-lipped team are ready to take to the field. The fans are in their seats and now all I need to do is find another team to play them! Maybe a follically-challenged eleven?
“Come on you slug balancers!!”
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